Having a sad time at the moment. A whole heap of crap from over 30 years ago, most of which I don’t remember, was thrown in my face by someone close to me.
At least, I thought they were close.
Then they proceeded to insult my house, the way I bring up my kids and a whole pile of other things. Just vindictive, nasty and unnecessary. Also with an ever-so-slight application of a selective memory that puts them in a better light than they deserve, this is only human and makes me smile a little, to be honest.
In case you don’t know, the waters of Lethe (or maybe it’s the Lethe – a river) are what the ancient Greeks believed the dead would drink in the underworld so that they could forget their lives because the memories of living and losing it all were too painful. This is also why we don’t remember our past lives, at least most of us don’t. I don’t want to forget any more. I used to have fantasies about some wonderous drug going into my arm and taking away all of the pain forever. But then I would also forget all of the good things and I don’t want to do that. Not even slightly. However I can’t remeber the details of what I am accused of, so I apologised for any slight, real or imagined and said goodbye. Now I am returning all of the gifts that weren’t gifts, they are wanted back by some cheesy manipulative ploy, some poxy emotional hook I’m supposed to have bitten on. It’s very silly and selfish.
Anyway, now I am faced with probably never speaking to this person again, other than in some kind of clipped code at weddings and funerals. They only ever spoke to me when it suited them, a loan or someone with a car to ferry them about on some errand or other. And they always treated my like a dickhead. I’m not sure what I’m gonna miss, to be honest. I’d like to sort out these memories they carry around that are causing them such pain and bitterness – but I can’t remember that much. I was mired in misery myself from the age of about 10 to 23 or so. Then I moved on, and recovered from the damage that was my childhood and teenage years.
Move on, and keep the precious things close. Forget the rest of it, it only brings pain.
Grow up. But no-one ever listens to that one.