A long week getting software into a stubborn target system. 3rd time lucky. It was infrastructre all the time but I had to convince the infrastructure crew to look again, which was 90% of the effort.

I’m a bit strung out; haven’t meditated for ages and losing my faith slowly. I don’t feel any sense of loss. Since the last blog the whole thing has unravelled for me.  Yet I remember losing my depression and getting a lot of benefit from it.

I need to talk to the Lama and try to make sense of this, but want to wait until I have returned back home. I have realised that I was pretending a lot of things to myself but now need to shake myself out of intense apathy about everything.

Going to a Winbiz conference this weekend: that should do the trick!

Went to see some old friends this week. They’re very content with what they’ve got, even managed to organise a small holding. I’d rather have my kids. tho’. It’s funny how your dreams come true when you want them enough.

Sleep is calling.